Tired of the same old Washington Politics? Well, now you can do something about it. It’s February 2020 and we’re officially kicking off the Island Dogs for President Campaign. This is how it works. When someone ask, “Who are you voting for?” Simply say, Island Dogs, and then grab a beer or rum drink.
What does the Island Dog candidate promise if elected? Free beer and rum drinks and munchies and stuff along that line to everyone who wants it. FREE, I say. FREE! And while we’re at it, we might as well throw in some music. If we can afford a free wall, and free healthcare, and free college, we can damn sure afford beer and tacos. We’ll finally have a voice that makes sense to all of us. We’ll finally get free stuff that we actually want, like a pool with a beach and a tiki bar on the back lawn of the White House. All heated, of course.
So, how is the Island Dogs campaign different than all the others campaigns, other than promising epic parties? We are not only not asking for donations, we are saying straight out that we do not want donations. I’ve got no idea how all that campaign finance stuff works. And while I know lots of politicians get rich doing this stuff, we’re just looking for a better way of life. Not looking for money or jail time. We are not a Socialist Party. We are the Socializing Party.
So, grab and beer and a burger. Or grab a margarita and a taco, and remember that our goal is to Make Americans Island Dogs! (MAID). Jus Chillin… that’s our goal in life.
So, if you’re confused about who to vote for, go to the closest beach bar and Make Americans Island Dogs.
You’re not from the USA? No matter. Being an Island Dog is an international goal. Maybe we can get the United Nations in on the campaign.
As a side note, we will not be participating in any pre-election debates… unless free drink and munchies are served, and we get to have input on what music is played. That is our only campaign demand at this time.